Finding “the one” can be a journey, and, unfortunately, you might encounter some wrong “ones” along the way. According to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), nearly 70,000 people reported a total of $1.3 billion lost to romance scams in 2022. Additionally, a January 2023 survey of over 5,000 adults reported that 25% of American respondents had fallen victim to an online dating scam at some point. As staggering as these figures are, they don’t even represent the full picture — the vast majority of fraud is never reported.
Romance scams prey on people’s vulnerability and willingness to take risks to find love, lulling victims into a false sense of security before robbing them of their money, personal information, and identities.
Keep reading to learn how they operate, how to spot them, and how you can avoid falling into the traps.
Online dating requires a sense of curiosity and willingness to interact with strangers that fraudsters thrive on, setting the stage for them to swoop in and change your life — just not in the way you’d hoped.
Fortunately, understanding the ins and outs of romance scams can help you protect yourself, even when it’s difficult to accept the reality of the situation.
The goal of a romance scam is to establish and maintain a fake online relationship in order to gradually solicit information, money, and/or gifts. Unlike spam calls that can take minutes or less, these ploys are designed to create a false sense of trust over time, potentially leading to consistent rewards for the scammer.
The details may vary from case to case, but romance scams typically follow the same basic steps:
In some cases, scammers skip the dating profiles and go straight to your text messages. Romance scams are sometimes combined with wrong-number text scams, which occur when scammers send you a text that appears to be intended for someone else. In reality, the goal is to turn the “mistake” into a conversation and, ultimately, a believable connection.
Romance scammers have the same goals as other phone scammers: to steal data and money from unwitting targets. However, the process may slightly differ from other robocalls and smishing scams. Familiarize yourself with the premises and tactics romance scammers use so you can keep yourself safe from trouble.
Some romance scammers pose as members of the armed forces, often pretending to be deployed overseas. This provides an automatic excuse as to why they can’t video chat or meet in person, and it creates the opportunity to ask for money to supplement a military stipend or better communicate while you’re apart.
A simple way to tell if someone is really in the military is to have them send you an email from a “.mil” account. Every member of the military has this type of email address, and if they have access to the internet, they should be able to prove it.
A fraudulent love interest might claim to be owed a significant inheritance they can only receive once they’ve married. The inheritance (which may be a large sum of money, jewelry, precious metals, or other valuable items) would sweeten the deal for both sides, and it would set the stage for a prosperous life together. However, in addition to paying for your “fiancée’s” flight to come meet you, you’d have to pay taxes on the inheritance.
It would be great if the love of your life came with a million dollars, but it’s vital to watch out for “too good to be true” situations when online dating. Don’t make binding agreements with or transfer money to anyone whose identity you haven’t comprehensively verified.
Because of the user protections that dating and social media apps offer, a romance scammer may try to direct you somewhere more discreet. Once you’re off the platform, they might send you malicious links that download malware onto your device or send you to fake websites that steal your personal information.
Never click links in dating profiles or unexpected texts or emails, even if you’ve been regularly communicating with the sender online.
Private personal media is an especially sensitive aspect of romance scams, and there are different ways it can factor in. In one approach, scammers offer revealing photos in exchange for personal information that can be used to compromise your identity. In another, they solicit racy photos to use as blackmail so you’ll meet their demands.
Never send personal information or private photos to those you don’t personally know and trust. If an online dating partner pressures you or makes you feel uncomfortable, you can always block them.
Although this type of scam is only romance-adjacent, it still seeks to steal your information via your online dating apps. The scammer calls, texts, or emails you posing as a popular dating app and prompting you to update your information to verify your profile. They may pretend there was suspicious activity on your account or claim it’s a routine fraud-prevention practice. Unfortunately, any information you give them may be used to steal from you.
Verifying accounts on dating apps helps improve security, but only when done legitimately. Dating apps such as Tinder, Hinge, and OkCupid will never call or text you to verify your profile or ask for sensitive information.
Many people take to dating sites and apps in search of a long-lasting connection. Unfortunately, sometimes, that connection can have severe emotional and financial repercussions.
Falling victim to a romance scam can take a toll on several levels. You may feel betrayed upon realizing you were tricked by someone who claimed to care about you, which can lead to anxiety, difficulty connecting with people, and a general lack of trust. You may be saddened by the loss of companionship, even if the connection you thought you had was driven by ulterior motives.
To add insult to injury, you might also have to deal with the emotional stress that comes with losing your life savings.
In many cases, the scammer’s goal from the outset is financial fraud. While some quickly begin requesting money or gift cards, others may lay the groundwork for months before pitching their scam. Even if the scammer doesn’t ask for a lump sum early on, smaller costs can add up quickly.
A romance scammer might ask for funds to supposedly pay for:
Recognizing red flags is an essential part of dating in general, but the skill is especially mandatory when it comes to online dating. Familiarize yourself with the warning signs of a scam, and be sure to do your due diligence when you meet someone online.
It’s easy to get rosy-eyed when you think you’ve met the person of your dreams, but it’s critical to keep an eye out for red flags. The sooner you recognize the warning signs of a potential scam, the easier it is to snap out of the trance and realize you’re being tricked.
Knowing your online match is, in fact, who they say they are can put your mind at ease and help you avoid dangerous situations. Fortunately, there are a few steps you can take to verify that your romantic interest is legitimate.
Sometimes, you have to be vulnerable and “put yourself out there” when dating. However, that doesn’t mean you should let your guard down entirely. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but some are catfish — so it pays to be cautious.
Stay alert and take the proper safety measures when dipping into the online dating pool.
Phone fraud is a serious problem that causes tens of billions of dollars in losses to American consumers every year. Romance scams often move from dating apps to text messages and phone calls, where the original platform can no longer protect you. That’s where Robokiller comes in.
Robokiller blocks calls and texts from scammers. That means if your romantic connection tries to contact you off-platform but can’t get through, then Robokiller has likely identified them as a suspected threat. The app intercepts suspicious calls and texts, so they never have the chance to take advantage of you.
Using a robust algorithm based on machine learning and artificial intelligence (AI) as well as a global database of over 1.5 billion flagged phone numbers, Robokiller blocks 99% of unwanted scam calls, spam texts, and phone fraud. You can also use our phone number lookup tool to check the numbers of any potential suitors before calling or texting.
Finding love may take a leap of faith, but make sure the risks you take are calculated. It’s crucial to stay vigilant and protect yourself from fraudsters looking to manipulate you. Keep the above tips in mind and download Robokiller to bolster your defenses against calls and texts from scammers.
Swipe left on romance scams and protect yourself from phone fraud when you start your free 7-day Robokiller trial today.
Like other types of phone scams, romance scams attempt to elicit information, money, and/or gifts from strangers. They often begin on dating apps but may quickly move to text messaging or other platforms. Romance scammers establish a romantic connection with the target before making their pitch. Once they do, they may continue to dig for information or ask for favors for as long as they can get away with it. According to one 2023 survey, 25% of American respondents had fallen victim to a romance scam.
Your online relationship might be a scam if your partner claims to live far away, won’t meet in person (or by video chat), or smothers you with excessive flattery early on. You should also beware of suspicious profile images, a lack of online presence, and attempts to direct you away from the dating app. If the person asks you for money, chances are good they’re trying to scam you.
If you think you may be caught up in a romance scam, stop communicating with the other person. If you’ve shared login credentials (like your Netflix password), update every account that uses those details. Don’t reveal any personal information, and be careful not to click links in messages or profiles. If you have given away identifying information or money, file a police report.
Many romance scams begin on a dating app, where the customer support team can monitor for suspicious activity. If the conversation moves from the app to your text messages, however, you’ll need a different kind of support. Robokiller blocks 99% of all texts and calls from scammers, so shady characters from dating apps won’t get through to your phone.
Emotional manipulation always plays a role in phone fraud, but it’s especially deceitful in romance scams. These schemes convince you you’re in love, a legitimate relationship, or, at the very least, a caring friendship. A romance scammer may mirror your interests, use other people’s photos, and flood you with adoration to quickly establish a bond. Unfortunately, they ultimately break that bond by soliciting money and/or information.
